Aimsworld

just a state of mind

for the past few days, i felt like i was losing it. i made a mistake allowing myself to wallow in sadness. i wasn't able to pull myself out of it immediately that it sunk me deep into the state of depression. i didn't like the feeling, it was awful...but it made me write and write and think and write what i was thinking. i was able to release emotions of sadness, loneliness, anger, etc through writing. crying is cathartic and i don't see anything wrong with it. if i could cry by will to release emotions i would...but unfortunately, crying isn't something i am able to do very often or when needed. writing on the other hand, is therapy for me-like dry tears on paper! anyway, i still didn't like the feeling and writing wasn't enough if i wanted to pull myself together in time to start working productively this week. imagine this, i kept on thinking and writing and didn't talk much. my mind became too active it didn't allow me to rest or sleep...so obviously the rest of my body was tired and my mind was tired too. being physically, mentally, and emotionally stressed isn't exactly the best way to pull oneself together. what helped? a friend of mine, asked me how i was and in an instant, i became fine. somehow the genuine act of concern subtracted the feeling of loneliness. with one less burden of an emotion off my chest, i was able to remind myself that depression is just a state of mind and not a lifestyle.

oh yeah, i still lack sleep and i'm very tired. i have a string of meetings today and i'll be leaving the house very early. i doubt i'll be able to get enough rest. i hope i won't have an emotional relapse! hehehe i don't think i will but i'm feeling a bit trippy and high. goodluck to me! or shall i say, goodluck to the ones who'll be around me! :D

umm...i don't know what else to write...the end!

posted by yma @ 03:33